midna03
Friendship Rank 2
Posts: 51 
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Post by midna03 on Aug 18, 2022 23:38:54 GMT -5
Hello! I am not sure where to put this particular question since it is not necessarily a bug or anything... But I have noticed some grammar mishaps both in game dialogue and in the accompanying game lang files and so I have been documenting them for a little while. I like to read things and I like proofreading essays too much for my own good lol Now, I know that text isn't super important at the Alpha stage so I just wanted to ask Falcondev if they would like a compiled dump of things anybody has found so far that may be grammatically off or to hold off until the Beta stage.  |
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Post by Falcon Development on Aug 19, 2022 8:28:50 GMT -5
Any grammar/spelling errors you find I'd be happy to review!
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midna03
Friendship Rank 2
Posts: 51
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Post by midna03 on Aug 19, 2022 18:20:25 GMT -5
Okay well I am slowly going through each lang file for the NPCs right now so its a little slow going because uh... Alabaster is, shall we say, eloquent. I will keep updating this until I am done skimming the files! Below is going to be spoilers for NPC dialogues (including dialogue from dating, marriage, and things most players would likely not find unless they were intentionally being mean to NPCs) so please only open the spoiler at your own risk, thanks. (: Found on “tigerbutterflyitem.lang”
"lang_item_description": "A flying insect with a black stripes on its yellow wings."
Need to remove the “a.”
Found on "alabaster.lang"
"lang_npc_married_break_up_with_player_dialog": …Our relationship has been on a collision course with disaster for some time now. The love and passion and respect left long along.///
Relatively long string of dialogue but this particular section is towards the end. I assume the “left long along” was supposed to be “left long ago.”
"lang_npc_intro_friendship_rank_two": "[playful]Keep your spirits high, and you can tackle any challenge that life throws at you. You've just got to keep putting one paw in front of the other, and who knows were life will take you?"
Were in the last sentence needs to be where.
"lang_npc_blizzard": …I'll help anyway I can.",
Right at the end of the dialogue. It would be “any way” as opposed to “anyway.” “I can do it whatever way you need it done” vs “I can do it regardless of any circumstances” with ‘any way’ vs ‘anyway’ respectively. Weird subtle difference but English is weird.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_four_1": …It is hard to remember what is was like to be single and solo."
Right at the end of the dialogue. The ‘is’ after what needs to be ‘it.’
Found on "bob.lang"
"lang_npc_intro_marriage_rank_zero": "[happy]Well now, this is the married life, ain't it. Kind of nice, if ya ask me."
Not exactly a typo but… given the context of the statement with “rank zero,” not sure if it makes sense. Unless Bob is being sarcastic?
"lang_npc_night_1": "[neutral]Goodness, I am tired. I need to head to home soon.///[thinking]I've been nodding off for about an hour now. I should have turned in long ago."
“Head to home soon” is a little awkward to read and, to me, sounds better as “head home soon.” Of course, it could just be like this because of the way Bob’s accent or mannerisms are written so take this with a grain of salt. (:
"lang_npc_night_3": "[neutral]It sure has been a long day, hasn't it. I'm all tuckered out. I'll sleep real good tonight."
Maybe change the period to a question mark after “hasn’t it.” The little add on at the end turns the sentence into a question.
"lang_npc_snow": "[neutral]The snow is kinda beautiful, ain't it. I like how it shines on the tree branches."
Same as above but with “ain’t it” instead.
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_one_4": "[neutral]How you've been doin' #player_name#? I've been alright myself. Getting on as I always have.///[happy]It's a nice place to live out here in the Wildwood."
Maybe change the beginning to “How’ve you been doin’” because the current way it is written would be ‘how you have been doin’” when the conjunction is separated.
"lang_npc_dating_rank_three_2": "[neutral]I think about a lot of time I've waisted in the past. I feel like I'm on the right path now. Instead of just living day-by-day, I've got a plan now. I think I'm going to enjoy the future very much."
“Waisted” should be wasted. I believe this one has already been addressed in another thread.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_one_3": "[neutral]So this is how forever feels, ain't it. I sure glad that we ended up together."
Needs a question mark after “ain’t it.”
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_one_5": "[happy]This is the life, ain't it. I'm about as happy as a cat could be. That's mostly thanks to you, ya know!"
Same as above.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_two_4": "[happy]We're doing good, ain't we.///[neutral]It's nice being paired up with someone who really gets you."
Also same as above.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_three_1": "[thinking]Remember when we just started dating? We've sure grown a lot since then, haven't we.///[neutral]I hardly recognize the cat I was. You've really changed my life, #player_name#."
Again, same as above.
An alternative would be to remove the "haven't we" part so the sentence doesn't end with a question mark and there aren't two question mark sentences on the same text box but that kind of messes with Bob's verbal mannerisms.
Found on "buttercup.lang"
"lang_npc_dating_break_up_with_player_dialog": "[sad]...I don't really where we're headed, #player_name#... I hope you'll understand, but I'm not happy here.///[sad]Please leave me alone."
I assume “I don’t really where we’re headed” was supposed to be “I don’t really like...” or “I don’t really know...”
"lang_npc_intro_festival": "[shocked]There so many cats here! Are we sure they're all safe?"
I think it needs to be “there's so many cats here!" or "there are so many cats here!"
"lang_npc_birthday": "[shocked]I don't even tell others when its my birthday. How do they all figure it out??"
The “its” in this sentence needs an apostrophe.
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_two_5": "[shocked]I hope I'm not in trouble!! Usually when a cat wants to talk its to tell me that I messed up.”
The “its” here would also need an apostrophe.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_four_3": "[thinking]I still feel like you're too good for me. I don't know why I can't shake the feeling"
Missing a period at the very end.
Found on “champ.lang”
"lang_npc_rain": "[playful]Rain's good for something. It hides your scent and your muffles your sounds.///[thinking]Of course, that works in reverse, too. Keep your wits about you and you won't fall victim to the schemes of smarter cats."
Need to remove the extra “your” behind the word muffles.
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_three_1": "[shocked]Can you believe the nerve of some cats? #npc_name_spark# keeps giving me a nasty look everytime I walk by.///
“Everytime” needs to be two separate words “every time.”
Found on "charlotte.lang"
"lang_npc_den_dating_5": "[shocked]Hey, can you make sure you put everything back where you left it before you leave? I get super worked up if anybody moves my stuff.///[neutral]I have a system in place, and I don't want it getting messed with. Nothing personal."
“Put everything back where you left it” seems like it needs to be “put everything back where you found it” instead.
"lang_npc_dating_rank_two_1": ///[neutral]I assume that if you had a problem with you, you would have left me alone a long time ago.
This is towards the end of the dialogue. I think it is supposed to say “if you had a problem with it” instead of “a problem with you.”
Found on “coco.lang”
"lang_npc_spring_festival_married": "[happy]There's nothing more romantic than frollicking through the flowery fields with my beloved!"
“Frollicking” needs to be “frolicking.”
Found on “elli.lang”
"lang_npc_intro_players_birthday": "[thinking]Has anybody given you anything awesome for you [rainbow]birthday[/rainbow] yet, #player_name#?"
The “you” before birthday needs to be “your.”
"lang_npc_intro_marriage_rank_three": "[neutral]It's #player_name#! Anything errands you need done today, love?"
I think either “Anything” needs to change to “Any”, or the word “errands” needs to be taken out of the sentence.
Found on “ember.lang”
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_one_3": …[neutral]Becoming a parent is a trial in its own right. Also very rewarding, but its hard work."
The second “its” in this section needs an apostrophe.
"lang_npc_dating_rank_two_3": …There was a lot of days where I felt abandoned and overwhelmed.///
The “was” in this section would be “were,” as it is referring to multiple days as opposed to one day.
Found on “fliss.lang”
"lang_npc_den_2": …Here, let me grab some grass to make a spot for your to sit. Hang tight, it'll only be a second."
Right at the end of the dialogue. The “your” before the word sit needs to be “you.”
Found on “garlic.lang”
"lang_npc_autumn_festival": "[shocked]The moon sure it bright tonight, isn't it? Is that some sort of sign from #npc_name_theforestguardian#??///
The “it” before bright needs to be “is.”
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_four_4": "[happy]I can't put my paw on it, but for some reason today feels like it's going to be a good day. What a strange feeling.///[neutral]Maybe my luck with take a turn for the better."
I think it needs to be “maybe my luck will take a turn” as opposed to “with take a turn.”
"lang_npc_dating_rank_four_3": …[angry]Everytime I'd be close to drifting up it would twitch and hit me in the face!///
“Everytime” needs to be two separate words, as in “every time.” This is moreso just a nitpicky one on my part from a bajillion essays marked off for using ‘everytime’ so feel free to ignore this one. lol
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_two_3": …[angry]I must have been hungry because I found a crumbs on the ground around the bed. Whoops.///
The “a” before crumbs needs to be removed. Also, same with the midnight snacks.
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_four_1": …[angry]I was so darn angry! I still am little mad about it.///
There needs to be an “a” before the word “little.”
Found on “glimmer.lang”
"lang_npc_blizzard": "[angry]This storm will drive the prey away for good! We will have a great among of work to do tomorrow to dig us out of this terrible snowfall."
I think “great among of work” is supposed to be “great amount of work.”
Found on “jag.lang”
"lang_npc_winter_festival": "[happy]I love how the light sparkle with different colors. How do you think those are powered, anyways?///
This was already mentioned in this thread, but the sentence should either be “how the lights sparkle” or “how the light sparkles.” Leaning more towards the first one since “those” in the second sentence implies multiple lights.
Found on “krampy.lang”
"lang_npc_marriage_rank_three_3": …[thinking]I am not good to distilling my thoughts into written word, so I must share my findings verbally.
The wording here is a little odd. Should it be “I am not good at distilling my thoughts” instead?
Found on “lainey.lang”
"lang_npc_dating_rank_four_5": "[playful]I had a rough morning. Woke up late, forget to eat breakfast, accidentally knocked over a jar of paint and broke it.///
“Forget” needs to be “forgot,” as Lainey is saying it in past tense.
Found on “phantom.lang”
"lang_npc_last_half_winter": "[thinking]It has been a good year, hasn't it.
This sentence needs a question mark at the end, as the “hasn’t it” at the end changes the initial statement to a question.
"lang_npc_friendship_rank_zero_1": …You only seem to make things worst."
At the end of the dialogue. “Worst” in this sentence should be “worse.”
"lang_npc_dating_rank_one_4": "[neutral]This is so weird. I honestly forgot you gave me that [green]Red Rose[/green] until you saw you approaching. I'm still getting used to it."
I think it is supposed to say “until I saw you approaching” and not “until you saw you approaching.”
Found on “spark.lang”
"lang_npc_last_half_winter": "[playful]This is great packing snow! #npc_name_ember# says not to throw snowballs because its rude.///
The “its” in this section needs an apostrophe.
Found on “talon.lang”
"lang_npc_last_half_summer": "[neutral]Could have sworn I saw some leaves falling from the trees.///[thinking]Or maybe it was just a butterfly. My eyesight's not so good as it once was."
“My eyesight’s not so good as it once was” sounds a little awkward to read (at least to me) and I think it would sound a little better as “not as good as it once was.” Of course, this is up to your discretion. (:
"lang_npc_player_low_hunger": "[thinking]Our hunters have reported that the prey is hard to come by today. I can see its had an effect on you too, #player_name#. I think I can see your ribs."
I believe this one was mentioned in this thread, but the “its” just before the word “effect” needs to have an apostrophe because it would be a conjunction of “it has.”
"lang_npc_dating_rank_three_2": "[neutral]It's strange. I usually get antsy when I'm around another cat, but its not that way around you any more. It doesn't feel any different than when I'm alone.///
The “its” after the word “but” needs an apostrophe and “any more” needs to be “anymore.” The difference is subtle, but think of it this way: “Is there any more coffee?” vs. “I don’t like coffee anymore.”
Found on “theforestguardian.lang”
"lang_npc_comment_player_is_dating_Coco": "[happy]I am glad to see that you are #npc_name_coco# get along so well together.
I think it is supposed to say, “you and #npc_name_coco#” instead of “you are #npc_name_coco#.”
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Post by StormClawPonyRises on Aug 19, 2022 19:50:45 GMT -5
I've also found a potential grammatical mistake if it's alright to add it here: During the winter festival while speaking to Jag, Jag makes this comment:  The sentence is odd, either "light" needs to be "lights" or "sparkle" needs to be "sparkles". I believe Jag means "lights" not light, as there's multiple of them (fairy lights on the trees), and the second sentence uses the word "those" (plural) and refers to them being powered. |
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Post by masterkat on Aug 19, 2022 20:00:45 GMT -5
I found a couple possible grammar things, too, just playing the beginning of the game and chatting with the NPCs. I haven't dug into any files, so I can't say exactly where they are there for an easier fix (sorry!).
The first I found was with Talon - when you're hungry he says
The "its" is a contraction of "it has", so it should be "it's"
The second may not actually be a grammar thing, but it still gave me pause when I read it - I was speaking with Bob and he said:
The first part just struck me as odd because in my mind I read it as "How've you been doin'" and then read it again as "How you have been doing?".
Love the game so far, look forward to playing it and seeing it as you continue to develop it!
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midna03
Friendship Rank 2
Posts: 51
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Post by midna03 on Aug 19, 2022 20:13:49 GMT -5
Yeah I have personally seen the Jag and Bob ones you guys posted too, getting them compiled in my list before I update it in a bit
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midna03
Friendship Rank 2
Posts: 51
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Post by midna03 on Aug 20, 2022 16:01:58 GMT -5
Hey!
I have skimmed through the files up until Coco for right now. My second post has been updated under the spoiler with all the errors I have found so far. Still working on the rest of them!
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Post by Falcon Development on Aug 21, 2022 8:35:59 GMT -5
Hey! I have skimmed through the files up until Coco for right now. My second post has been updated under the spoiler with all the errors I have found so far. Still working on the rest of them! Thanks, this has been very helpful! I've reviewed all the mistakes you've found so far and patched them up in the dev build. Please do post if you find more and I'll be happy to take a look. |
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Post by Revlis_ on Aug 21, 2022 10:04:58 GMT -5
Found one!
In a 4 star dialogue with Garlic, they say “I can’t put my paw on it, but for some reason today feels like it’s going to be a good day. What a strange feeling. / Maybe my luck with take a turn for the better.” I’m assuming that “with” should be “will”!
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Post by TeaTenda on Aug 21, 2022 18:21:18 GMT -5
The second may not actually be a grammar thing, but it still gave me pause when I read it - I was speaking with Bob and he said: The first part just struck me as odd because in my mind I read it as "How've you been doin'" and then read it again as "How you have been doing?". Since Bob seems to have some kind of southern dialect and I'm from the south, though I don't claim to be an expert on such things, both "How ya been doin'" and "How've you been doin'" seem like they might be appropriate 'fixes' to me? Though I think using 'ya' would sell the accent better. But for all I know I could be wrong and the line is fine as is. |
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midna03
Friendship Rank 2
Posts: 51
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Post by midna03 on Aug 24, 2022 0:49:47 GMT -5
Hey! I apologize for taking a few days to finish up, college just started and move-in was a butt. I am officially done looking through all the files and I have updated the second post with all the files and any errors found.
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Post by 0revlis0 on Oct 5, 2022 10:12:22 GMT -5
 Found one from Rosemary- 3 hearts dialogue, “Honestly I'm not sure if it's work the hassle. Plus those Crabs sure do like to come after you if you spot you walking along the beach,” rather than “worth the hassle.” |
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Post by 0revlis0 on Oct 5, 2022 10:15:37 GMT -5
Oh, found another. Zephyr 2 star (possibly spring) dialogue, "What then are you,[name]?" with no space before the player's name.
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